Watching Baby scrunch toasted seaweed into his mouth with both hands, I laughed. He's so funny! How'd he learn to do that? I didn't model it. Every year the holidays sweep me with the same inexplicable euphoria—he is the best Christmas gift. I didn't always feel this way. . . .

One Christmas Eve's morning found my cervix softening, opening up. I was in awe and a little scared. Was I really bringing a baby into this world?

My husband D. and I walked to the estuary nearby. We saw two birds—Mama and Papa Egret! Beautiful! I immediately arrived at Eagle Peak.

Eagle Peak is the Land of Tranquil Light, a Buddha Land, where living beings enjoy themselves at ease. This land exists on Earth when we summon our enlightened (Buddha) nature wherever we are. Seeing Egret, I connected: with faith (Buddhism) via family (motherhood), I would make “rei/ryo/holy.”

Contractions kicked in that night. Pressure mounted on my back. Oh, joy—back labor. Baby was facing out.

On Christmas morning, my homebirth midwife Kristen encouraged Baby to face in. Indoor strategies failed. D. and I went outdoors. We saw a smaller egret—Baby Egret! Whew! Everything would be okay!

Buddhist practice means facing change. D. and I were changing family karma—we were breaking patterns, creating fresh futures for our successors. Being hospital-born babies, we opted for this homebirth. How fortunate to practice Buddhism by being present every moment of Christmas Day!

Christmas Day passed. I was fatigued. Kristen suggested an epidural at the hospital could optimize delivery sans C-section.

Buddhism posed the question: victory or defeat? Triumph or succumb? Did a hospital transfer equal failure?

I reflected about my birth. Mom labored long, and a C-section was required. Breastfeeding failed. I vomited everything. I stayed in the hospital for three months with no visitation. Because of my ordeal, I developed lifelong food allergies.

I did not want that for Baby. My own birth trauma must not become my baby's karma, too. I must try my best to avoid the delivery via C-section. Baby's safe delivery was paramount--that's victory.

I did go to the hospital and get the epidural. At the same time I wondered: Was there any withheld communication between D. and me that made us not present and ready to receive Baby into this world?

In privacy D. and I dialogued, united, and prayed by chanting in unison three times the Buddhist mantra Nam-myoho-renge-kyo.

Back labor continued in multiple positions. Finally, someone suggested: try laughing. My first attempts sounded so funny I actually laughed. The midwives laughed with me.

Baby's head appeared. Soon, we laughed Baby out. How fitting for Baby A., whose name means “happiness returns” or “happiness re-emerges.” His head faced out, emerging from the Earth toward the heavens.

With pure joy, D. caught our laughing-crying baby in his arms while laughter emitted from everyone in the room. We truly enjoyed ourselves at ease in Buddha Land.

~ Gloria Ng